Carrie's Memorial Movie. Posted Feburary, 2006

Dad's Photo Gallery

We celebrate Jan’s continuing journey with the God she so deeply loved. Jan leaves her husband and best friend, Herb, with rich and thankful memories of thirty-nine years of loving partnership. She gave life and love to her daughter Carrie (Adam) Harfield and son Scott. Jan will be deeply missed by her two grandchildren, Cody and Sarah Harfield, her father Ron Deeter and partner Frieda Hunter, her mother Sylvia Deeter, and sister Deborah, and her brother David (Penny) Deeter.

Jan’s deep faith and commitment to helping others enriched the faith communities to which she belonged. She lived her faith and shared a deep love and respect for all people and all life. Jan was passionate about social justice and her leadership and involvement at Community Suppers will continue through those who were touched by her energy, enthusiasm, and commitment to living love. A respected member of the business community, Jan will be missed by those who worked with her through many years.

A celebration of Jan’s life was held at Duncan United Church on Saturday, March 5th at 2:00 pm.

In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to the Jan Thompson Bursary which will assist individuals entering the fields of bookkeeping or accounting.

Donations can be forwarded to: Jan Thompson Bursary c/o Hayes, Stewart, Little & Company 100 - 435 Trunk Road Duncan, BC, V9L 2P5



By Lynne Downes

The Beginning

We were at St Andrews - Cowichan Station the Sunday that Jan and Herb first attended a
church service there. I was curious because they seemed a little old to have children
as young as the two who were with them that day.
It was during the coffee hour that we actually met Herb and Jan and discovered that they
were not the parents but the grandparents of those two children - Cody and Sarah. And so
the friendship was born.

Not long after that there was a vacancy on the St Andrew's Parish Council for a Treasurer.
At a meeting to discuss the matter, Jan turned to me with a surprised look on her face and said:
"Oh! That is something I can do". That comment has stayed with me because it characterizes
Jan for me. Whenever she recognized something that she could do, she simply did it with whole
heart, great dedication and no fuss and never fretted about the things she didn't feel qualified to do.
The work of Treasurer was more than a task for Jan. It was part of her desire to serve God the best
way that she could.

In time, Robbie and I, who were also on Parish Council, stepped into the roll of Church Wardens.
For those of you who don't know, the Wardens and Treasurer work closely - and with the help of
the other members of council, oversee the business side of a parish and keep a finger on the pulse
of church affairs in general. We three took our responsibilities very seriously but for some
reason, best known to himself, our rector, Ralph Cope, teasingly called us his Spice Girls.
The name stuck.
We Spice Girls, usually met on Saturday mornings to discuss church business over breakfast,
after which we would tackle any jobs that needed to be tackled.

It was at our Saturday morning breakfasts that the personal bond of friendship also blossomed
that has united us ever since.
We could talk about anything at all. We laughed together in the good times and cried together
when we were sad. We could also count on each other for anything and in any circumstance.
For example, it was two days before a farewell party that I was planning for a parishioner, that
I got news that my mother was terminally ill. Disabled by my sadness but knowing that the party
could not be postponed, I phoned Jan and Robbie. They stepped into the breach and without batting
an eye-lid, put on that party in my home as if that was perfectly normal thing to do.

Such was our friendship. Jan was the practical one, gentle natured, kind, wise, cheerful and
quietly but deeply spiritual.


The End

October the 1st last year was a beautiful day - one of those warm and cloudless days when everything
looks as if it has been washed in technicolour. It was just before lunch when I heard that Jan had
just been diagnosed with cancer. I was stunned that such a thing could happen to our beloved friend
in the very prime of her life. Finding it impossible to concentrate, I left work early and drove
straight to Jan and Herb's home hoping that it was all a horrible mistake. It wasn't.

As was our habit in good times and in bad, the Spice Girls met for breakfast the very next morning.
We agreed to meet at the Pioneer House as we often did - because Robbie loves the absolutely enormous
Sticky Buns one can get there. Given the circumstance, I did suggest a more private venue but Jan was
quite adamant that because of its logs and subdued lighting, the restaurant was dark enough to hide our
tears - as long as we remembered to cry quietly!

Despite our grief, our conversation that day was, as always, easy, open, frank and even funny.
Jan voiced her hopes, her fears and her regrets. She also wanted to discuss every aspect about
dying that we could imagine. Our discussion clarified things for Jan.
By the end of that breakfast, she knew she wanted to die as if it was a natural thing to do -
which it is of course. It's just something that we of western culture too often forget. Jan didn't
want to pretend or deny that she was dying but she didn't want to go through the process alone.
She wanted to have her family and friends with her - not to mourn, but to support her in her hour of need.
She told me that she could face anything - including struggle - as long as she was not in pain. And that
is indeed how it happened.
When Jan knew that there was not going to be a significant reprieve from her illness, she didn't waste
time feeling sorry for herself or bemoaning the fact that she had to get off the bus while she was still
enjoying life's journey. True to character, she let go of the things she could do nothing about and made
the most of the good things.
These last few weeks have been remarkable. Room 214 at the Cowichan District Hospital has witnessed an
unceasing outpouring of love for Jan by family and friends that is rare. Supported by prayer, Jan was
filled with peace, gratitude and amazement. She was amazed that her grandchildren and their friends would
spend time with her; that a friend would weed her garden or massage her feet. She was amazed there were so
many people to sit at her bedside and hold her hands. She was amazed that her co-workers from Hayes would
pick up her bookkeeping where she left off. Jan kept her humour to the end - keeping open the debate about
whether or not Carrie was a perfect child. What we all know is that she would never have changed Carrie
or Scott for any other.
Always a doer Jan plans to pave the way for the rest of us. I'm sure she will have the teapot hot for
the next time we meet.
For now, Jan dear, we bid you adieu with thanks and much love. It's an honour to be your friend
- and yours Herb.



A TRIBUTE TO JAN
OUR DEAR FRIEND

By Robbie Fritz


My husband, Bill and I were chatting with Herb at coffee time after church, and Herb declared:
"Bill, you married the second best woman in the world. I married the best!"
Yes, Herb, you were absolutely right! You've also given me to ponder, "What IS the best?"
In doing so, because Jan was a deeply spiritual person, I chose to refer to the thirty-first Chapter
of the Book of Proverbs, which is entitled: "Epilogue: The wife of Noble Character.

Verses 10 and 11

A wife of noble character, who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies
Her husband has full confidence in her
And she lacks nothing of value
She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.

Full confidence, indeed! Jan was a skilled professional woman. She was employed by the accounting firm of
Goodman Mott, followed it into merger with Hayes, Stewart, Little, and Company and latterly decided to establish
her own bookkeeping business. Although her client base burgeoned, she remained associated with Hayes, which
attests to the value they placed upon her work. Her dear spouse was indeed proud of her. I know, because I
once heard him boisterously crow: "Jan's the best damn bookkeeper around!"

Verse 17

She sets about her work vigorously
Her arms are strong for her task

In addition to her employment and a thriving business, Jan was a conscientious and reliable resource in any
endeavour she undertook. She faithfully held the position of Treasurer at St. Andrew's for eight years,
and well into her illness.
Her records were impeccable and up-to-date. She could locate an entry "in a heartbeat", as Herb would
put it. During the term of the "Spice Girls" at St. Andrew's, the parish hall was expanded, the Sunday
school refurbished and the Rector's office constructed and furnished. In these and many other undertakings,
Jan was a tireless worker, taking on extra tasks cheerfully and accomplishing them with good sense and great
sensitivity. I have never heard Jan speak in anger or speak negatively about another individual.

Verse 19

In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers.

Jan was a petite little blond who caught Herb's eye when she was just eighteen, in grade 11.
They married in Kamloops when she was 19. I'll bet she dressed up cute as a button back then,
because when we met, she was a classy looking lady, always tastefully and appropriately attired.
Jan and her daughter Carrie both enjoyed tackling their "distaff and spindle" and often together,
to produce lovely additions to their wardrobe.

Verse 20

She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy.


Jan had a heart for social justice. She served on the Outreach Committee at St. Andrew's. She was involved
in the founding and on-going management of the Global Initiatives Fair Trade Store. G.I.F.T.S. promotes
Fair Trade between our community and Third World countries through pre-Christmas bazaars. Monthly, Jan, Herb
and more recently, their son, Scott have worked here at Duncan United Church in the preparation and serving of
a community dinner for the disadvantaged.

Verse 25


She is clothed in strength and dignity
She can laugh at the days to come.

Jan had great inner fortitude. She never sought the limelight, but was quietly steadfast in all things.
Oh! She could laugh!! You could locate her in any crowd by her happy distinctive laugh.

Verse 26
She speaks with wisdom
And faithful instruction is on her tongue.

Jan took great joy in sharing with Carrie, Adam, and Herb, the up-bringing of her grandchildren,
Cody and Sarah. One can see a reflection of her diligence in the responsible and caring young
people they have become.

Verse 28
Her children arise and call her blessed; Her husband also, and he praises her.

No one could possibly dispute the love and support that Jan and her family showed each other.
Family photos cascade down the stairwell in their home. Visits to and from extended family members
were joyfully anticipated. Camping trips were shared. And this same warmth was extended to friends with
dinners and parties, at which there was always room for one more. Jan: a loyal and committed wife and
daughter, mother and grandmother, sister and friend.